Tell me about life

Here I am a senior with aspirations and dreams but really there are all things things I want to do but I don't know where to start. This is the hardest thing right now. Maybe what I need to do is concentrate more on what i want to do and doing it without thinking about what will happen on the way. Spontaneousness is something I always wished I was able to hold on to but was never able to harness it as I think about and over think things. This looks like it may be a new chapter in my life. A chapter of spontaneousness and self knowledge.

I have realized more and more lately that for some reason I am terrified of failing or being inadequate at something. So much that things I don't know how to do or things I know someone else is better at i will completely stay away from. So, maybe I need to explore this a bit more and learn about myself again.

I think the meaning of life is to live, love, care, and have compassion. To let others understand the way you feel and to learn from you and your perspective. To allow people to see you for what you really are . To leave with others how you made them feel and your memories.

I hope I allow people to see who I really am, as I know I block and hold information as much as possible to avoid myself being hurt in the process. Its almost embarrising to admit but I am terrified that once someone knows me, they won't like me.